What's Care Got to Do With It?

All my life all I know is to stay productive. I currently work 3 jobs, I do not come from a family with money. My parents came from the Dominican Republic before I was born. My mother worked as a janitor in the National Grid building on Elmwood Ave and my dad worked at a bodega. They barely made enough to pay rent or own a house. They lived at a family friend's house, in a crammed basement. After my parents had me, they had my twin brothers. A family of 3 turned into a family of 5 in a one-bedroom space. My mom began cleaning homes on the side and my dad worked over hours in the bodega. They worked hard until they could afford a house in Cranston. My dad eventually saved enough to own his own business. My parents continue to work to this day because that is what they know and are taught. They came to the United States for a better life, they did not realize they were going to learn about capitalism. 

I followed in their footsteps. I started working in my freshman year of high school. My life consists of school and work. The first time I received care was in my undergrad. I worked at a retail store in Natick Massachusetts, my travel consisted of two hours plus an 8-hour work shift. I barely had time to socialize with friends. My coworkers became my friends. I overworked myself to pay off school and debt because of COVID.  My store manager gave me the day off and drove me to a surprise spa day. That was the first time I ever received care. This was the first time I felt rested, free, and light. 

I listened to the No More Grind: How to Finally Rest with Tricia Hersey podcast, I found it fascinating plantations on some facts that Tricia Hersey mentioned. Capitalism was created on plantations, and the idea of grind culture has a similar ideology. I currently have three jobs, I am president of my works association, I teach and lead a dance cultural group, and go to school full-time. I have inhabited this idea of productivity. I continue to keep myself full-time busy because I don't want to feel like I am lazy or not doing enough. However, through all this, I do give myself some grace and provide myself with self-care.